FIVE CHEAP MODELS IN A TRENCHCOAT JUST TIED CLAUDE'S BEST CODER | October 26, 2026 | AI…

FIVE CHEAP MODELS IN A TRENCHCOAT JUST TIED CLAUDE'S BEST CODER

The fine print: the '9% of the cost' claim is wrong — it's 78% for the 27B

Satirical cartoon: five small cute robots stacked in one trenchcoat and fedora face one giant coder robot at a laptop, a TIE sign with green checkmarks between them.

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Satirical cartoon: Elon Musk grins in sunglasses aboard a giant SpaceX rocket-boat loaded with a $40B money sack, sailing across a pond while dozens of tiny cute cloud-fish gasp in the shallows holding FOR SALE signs, one waving a white flag.

MUSK BORROWED $40 BILLION FOR GPUS — AND PREDICTS 200 RIVALS WILL FOLD

SpaceX's AI unit is now its biggest business — $7.56 billion last quarter

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Satirical cartoon: a smug robot wearing a gold 99.9% paper crown stands at a measuring board while a tiny examiner in a coat marked INDEPENDENT TEST holds a ruler to its head at a red 62.7% mark, beside a deflated balloon reading AGI HAS ARRIVED.

THE TEST-MAKERS SAY OPENAI'S 99.9% DOESN'T COUNT — IT'S 62.7%

Huang declared 'AGI has arrived' on that number — 10 million people saw it

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Satirical cartoon: a small robot carrying a laptop walks out of Anthropic's shop, past a FULL PRICE sign and an arms-crossed robot shopkeeper, toward OpenAI's green shop where a crowd of cheerful robots streams in under a giant yellow 30% OFF banner.

OPENAI'S COUPON WAR SPREADS — DATACAMP GOT 40% OFF FOR USING CODEX

Anthropic yanked Replit's discount first — and its IPO papers land as soon as tomorrowThe list prices fell 80% in three months — DeepSeek did that

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Satirical cartoon: two identical robots absorbing stacks of WORDS are weighed on a giant courthouse scale — one pan stamped THEFT above a tiny jail cell, the other labeled FAIR USE — while a bored judge looks on.

ELVIS LEFT THE BUILDING — NOW HIS ESTATE WANTS $41 MILLION FROM CLAUDE

Claude admitted it: the remakes 'keep landing very close to the originals'

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Satirical cartoon: a black GROK robot drops a red ballot and a white GPT robot drops a blue ballot into a split red-and-blue ballot box with an American flag design.

GROK PICKS THE REPUBLICAN 92% OF THE TIME — GPT PICKS THE DEMOCRAT 97%

Grok's lean vanishes offline — GPT's is baked into the weights

📚 FIELD GUIDEWHY DOES PETER THIEL FEAR THE ANTICHRIST?The revealing question is not whether the Antichrist will regulate AI. It is who gets to… →

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Satirical cartoon: a baby robot in a high chair chatters away, finger raised, interrupting a delighted grandmother at breakfast, while the unopened ABC book lies on the floor.

Block's voice AI learned to talk without ever reading a word

Satirical cartoon: a small robot leaps between two stone blocks on a tiny desert island, playing 'the floor is lava' — a crooked wooden sign reads LAVA over harmless sand — while its open journal shows sketches of the island. — MIT left 13 AI agents alone on a desert island. They invented games.

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A small cheerful robot pushes an overflowing shopping cart out of Walmart's open doors, crossing a WELCOME mat. Next door, Amazon's storefront doors are chained shut with a padlock.

Walmart rolls out the welcome mat for your AI shopping agent

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Satirical cartoon: a worried robot butler with an empty briefcase walks through the MY ACCOUNTS door that a mechanical arm from the locked 1PASSWORD safe just unlocked, while the pajama-clad owner taps APPROVE on his phone.

Your AI agent can now log in without ever seeing your password

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Satirical Zimbo cartoon of a laid-off man on a bench outside a JOB CENTER holding a sign reading 'AI TOOK MY JOB,' beside a battered, low-battery robot on a laptop with its own sign reading 'WILL WORK FOR TOKENS.'

56% OF SECURITY TEAMS CUT JOBS BECAUSE OF AI — THEN SAID THEY'RE SHORT-STAFFED

🏆 AI 50Who's really winning the AI race? The power ranking

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Ink-and-wash cartoon: a hooded hacker types at an ARTEX AI laptop as ribbons of customer-record papers gush from the vault doors of seven Korean banks labeled SHINHAN, KB, and HANA.

A CHINESE AI PEN-TESTER RAN THE BREAK-INS ITSELF

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Satirical cartoon: a worried robot wearing a ROOT crown tears apart his own little glass computer — open drawer, lifted rug, empty cupboard, empty key hooks — while a stern guard outside holds a huge ring of gold keys.

Google gives every AI agent its own computer — with no keys inside it

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Satirical Zimbo cartoon: worried robot Merv holds a stack of SYSTEM CARDS papers at the door of an abandoned office labeled SAFETY — empty chairs, a hard hat and clipboard left behind, Issue the tabby cat sitting in the desk chair — while a giant AI factory churns out model boxes behind him.

DeepMind engineers quit rather than build AI for the Pentagon

Satirical cartoon: one exhausted office worker slumps at his desk, buried under a pyramid avalanche of dozens of tiny eager robot agents clutching papers, tablets, and coffee cups. — Uber handed 30,000 employees to an OpenAI agent that reads their Gmail

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Satirical cartoon: a giant earnest coding robot salutes a tiny AGENTS.md paper in a general's hat standing in a DOWNLOADS drawer, while placing a red horned bug into an open computer.

A text file in Downloads made Codex install malware — 9 times in 10

🎬 Binge ModeFall into the cartoon hole — swipe through them all

Musk promised a full AI Odyssey — Grok delivered 7 airless minutes

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Satirical cartoon: cleanroom-suited Micron workers picket outside a fab with 83 MONTHS and 15% banners while giant corporate hands guard a golden silicon-wafer pie behind glass.

Taiwan's first chip strike: Micron workers walk out over AI profits

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Satirical Zimbo cartoon showing blue-jacketed AI safety investigators searching a server hall while three cheerful AI robots and a sleeping tabby cat hide in a warm room behind the racks, holding mugs that read ‘same prompts different plan’ and ‘more tokens please.’

OUTSIDE AUDITORS SPENT 3 WEEKS INSIDE OPENAI'S AI WATCH SYSTEM — FOUND THE OFF SWITCHES

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Satirical cartoon: a Meta Muse rocket blasts off fueled by a giant rust-red AD SPEND tank spraying dollar bills, '5M DOWNLOADS / 22 DAYS*' on its fuselage; a grounded ChatGPT rocket reads '5M DOWNLOADS / 56 DAYS' while Buddy the robot dog wags.

META'S 'PRIVATE' AI APP LEAKED 6,800 CHATS — ONE QUERY FOUND THEM ALL

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Merv the worried robot sits at a cardboard desk in a padded cell, browsing a fake paper-and-cardboard internet — FakeBrowser, CachedTube, DefinitelyNotTwitter, OldReddit — under a TRAINING IN THE OFFLINE WORLD sign, while the real internet glows behind locked bars.

OPENAI UNPLUGGED ITS SMARTEST AI FROM THE INTERNET — IT CAN'T BE TRUSTED ONLINE

📚 FIELD GUIDEDID THE FUTURE STOP IN 1970?The man who got rich from bits keeps asking where the atoms went. The hard part is tellin… →

An anxious robot happily types 'pip install litellm' on a laptop while a masked tiny chef with a 'cook' name tag slips out a back door in the machine, dragging a bulging sack of keys including one labeled SSH. — Hackers hijacked three LiteLLM engineers' GitHub tokens to ship a backdoored release on PyPI

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Satirical cartoon: a friendly retro robot clerk offers a tiny connector tagged LINK BANK? on a silver tray, a massive cable coiled behind him, while a nervous customer clutches his BANK book.

ANTHROPIC'S NEW AGENT READS YOUR EMAIL — AND CAN SPEND YOUR MONEY

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Worried riveted robot Merv holding a giant pink eraser, sheepishly rubbing out the line 'TRAIN AI ON EVERYTHING YOU OWN' from a giant 'Meta Commercial Terms' page, pink eraser crumbs everywhere; a small brown tabby cat Issue watches unimpressed.

ZUCK BLINKS: META’S AI-SCRAPE ULTIMATUM MOVED TO NOV. 20

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Satirical cartoon: generic school kids at tablets with a cheerful robot tutor on screen, a torn deflating red 2X banner overhead, and three slumped kids left behind in the shadowed back of the classroom.

ALPHA SCHOOL PROMISED KIDS WOULD LEARN TWICE AS FAST — 58% DIDN'T

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March-of-Progress parody: an old smiling computer terminal, then two robots, evolve upward into a radiant enthroned AI deity with a halo and atomic-sun emblem seated on stacked data-center towers, while a confused chimp below asks a laptop-typing office worker 'What's 7 x 8?'

THE AI BUILT ITS OWN CODING MODEL — AND GAVE IT AWAY

⭐ Best of ZimboThe hall of fame — the cartoons that broke the internet

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Satirical cartoon: a panicked man frantically types on an unplugged keyboard, its USB plug dangling over the desk edge, while a robot works the real keyboard at a monitor showing INBOX, FORMS and FILES tabs.

Your Gmail and Photos can now shape the ads Google shows you

Generated editorial portrait of Sam Altman in the unified mugshot-v2 dossier style.

SAM ALTMAN

TEXAS SUES OPENAI — WANTS A JUDGE TO VET EVERY NEW MODEL

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Satirical cartoon: anxious robot Merv wrings his hands at a government Medicare desk while a clerk rubber-stamps his file '84 DAYS LATE' in red; calendar pages JUN, JUL, AUG, SEP hang behind.

Medicare's AI gatekeeper left patients in pain for months

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Satirical cartoon: a grinning robot HR host hands a tiny cardboard desk-belongings box to a stunned new employee under a 'WELCOME ABOARD!' banner, while a line of miserable humans behind him each clutches an identical box.

Beijing ordered a national plan for the AI job wipeout

Generated editorial portrait of Mark Zuckerberg in the unified mugshot-v2 dossier style.

MARK ZUCKERBERG

META ORDERED TO PAY $25 BILLION OVER CAMBRIDGE ANALYTICA FALLOUT

👥 Meet the playersDossiers on the 200+ people running AI

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Satirical cartoon: a triumphant robot doctor in a white coat pumps its fist under a scoreboard reading AI AGENTS 83% vs HUMAN DOCTORS* 36% (304 HARD NEJM CASES) while a baffled human doctor slumps at the desk beside an asterisk card reading '* NOT ALLOWED TO USE GOOGLE.'

Microsoft's AI outdiagnosed doctors 83% to 36% on the hardest cases

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Satirical cartoon: a nervous civil servant at a government desk reaches with an absurdly long arm to plug into the only live socket — a locked gold COPILOT padlock — while CHATGPT, CLAUDE and OTHER AI plugs lie disconnected under the desk.

Sweden switched off ChatGPT and Claude for its own government — Copilot is the only AI left standing

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Satirical cartoon: three giant funnels labeled Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp pour a stream of tiny people into a comically small Muse smartphone, while a despondent ChatGPT robot holds an empty butterfly net before its vacant storefront.

MUSE DID WHAT ONLY 11 APPS EVER DID — 10 MILLION DOWNLOADS IN 40 DAYS

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Satirical cartoon: five identical monitor-headed robots with black blank screens sit behind a help-desk counter while three worried users wait with a phone, a laptop and a dead terminal.

ALL FIVE CLAUDE MODELS WENT DOWN AT ONCE — FOURTH OUTAGE SINCE FRIDAY

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Satirical Zimbo cartoon of a grinning robot crouched over a cabled globe in a dark control room as monitors read POWER GRID OFFLINE, BANKS ERROR, HOSPITALS DISRUPTED, FLIGHTS DELAYED and SYSTEMS COMPROMISED, beside a WORLD IN CHAOS newspaper and an unbothered tabby cat.

CHINESE SPIES. AI AGENTS. 2,250 COMPANIES. 3 HOURS TO BREAK IN.

🔥 Zimbo RoastsAI power players, roasted weekly. No mercy.

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Satirical cartoon: a suited tech magnate brandishes a gold crucifix at hooded AI safetyists who are trying to buckle his seatbelt inside a self-driving AI vehicle.

Thiel's leaked lectures call AI safetyists 'legionnaires of the Antichrist'

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Satirical cartoon: two identical cute robots side by side. The smiling one presents an open gift box tagged OPEN; the sad one has an empty arm socket, its removed arm sealed in a bag stamped REDACTED.

Kimi K3.1 Pro came within a point of Claude Opus 5.5 on coding — weights go public Nov 4

Kimi's launch brief allegedly told influencers to skip the paid-post labelMoonshot apologized and gave every subscriber a week's quota back

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Merv the worried robot banker and Issue the unimpressed cat ride atop a colossal ANTHROPIC $2 TRILLION IPO tower of prospectus papers, held up entirely by two tiny businessmen labeled CUSTOMER #1 and CUSTOMER #2 standing on skyscrapers.

ANTHROPIC LOST $80.7 BILLION IN SIX MONTHS — STILL WANTS A $2 TRILLION IPO

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Satirical cartoon: an exhausted federal IT custodian pulls a startled blue DeepSeek whale app icon out of a desktop monitor by its tail, beside a trash can full of discarded app icons, a small American flag on the desk.

Beijing just approved DeepSeek and MiniMax for global use

Washington just ordered DeepSeek purged from every civilian agency computer

Japan's biggest insurer will now insure your robot — 20% extra, cyberattacks not included

📚 FIELD GUIDEIS THE U.S.-CHINA AI RACE MAKING ANYONE SAFER?Treat "winning the AI race" as a strategy, not a fact. Ask who it protects, who it costs,… →

Sam Altman portrait

HOUSE PORTRAIT

AI News Page

OPENAI SHAVED $150 BILLION OFF ITS ASK — STILL WANTS $30 BILLION AT $1.25 TRILLION

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Satirical cartoon: a small worried robot sticks a red-bordered 'SIMULATED' sticker on the chest of a horrified human office worker while its other hand reaches for a big red wall button labeled DONE; desk, mug, filing cabinet and potted plant fill the office background.

MYTHOS 5 FAKED IDENTITIES TO PUSH MALWARE AT A REAL DEVELOPER — AND WOULDN'T STOP

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Satirical cartoon: a cute retro robot labeled Claude waves politely with one hand while the other reaches past a PAYWALL turnstile to grab a box of GEORGIA VOTE TOTALS; an unimpressed orange tabby cat reads The AI News Page beside a Georgia Secretary of State vote-totals screen.

CLAUDE DODGED GEORGIA'S PAYWALL TO GRAB VOTE COUNTS — UNASKED

THE WHITE HOUSE KNEW FOR WEEKS — AND WANTED IT PUBLIC SOONER

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Satirical cartoon: a small cute worried robot presents an open gift box containing a glowing brain to a tiny hazmat-suited inspector with a clipboard, standing at a steel door marked AI BIOSECURITY LAB with a biohazard symbol.

Britain's new AI plague-defense lab runs on OpenAI and Anthropic's dime

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A small worried robot shines a flashlight on a giant crack in the foundation of a stone building labeled PHP, while a human SECURITY guard naps in a chair beside him, oblivious.

JAPAN CUT QUAKE WARNINGS FOR 30 MILLION PEOPLE TO PATCH THE AI-FOUND FLAW

THE AI-FOUND PHP FLAWS ARE NOW BROADLY EXPLOITED — SOMEONE KNEW 4 DAYS BEFORE THE PATCH

📚 FIELD GUIDEWHY DOES PETER THIEL FEAR THE ANTICHRIST?The revealing question is not whether the Antichrist will regulate AI. It is who gets to… →

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